top of page

Letting go of Limiting beliefs: the story of Maya.

Updated: Nov 7, 2023

Let me tell you a story. There was a young woman named Maya who had a passion for justice. She always dreamed of becoming a lawyer. Yet, she had many limiting beliefs that were holding her back from pursuing her dreams.

Maya grew up in a low-income family where higher education was not a priority. Her parents often told her that they could not afford to send her to college. That she should focus on finding a stable job to support the family. Maya internalized these beliefs. She did not believe that she was smart or capable enough to go to law school.

Furthermore, Maya's classmates in high school often made fun of her. She felt like an outsider and believed that people like her did not belong in the legal profession.

Despite her doubts and fears, Maya did well in college and even took a few pre-law courses. Yet, every time she thought about applying to law school, her limiting beliefs held her back. She believed that she was not good enough to compete with other applicants. Also, that law school was too expensive.

One day, Maya met a successful lawyer who saw her potential and encouraged her to apply to law school. The lawyer told her that her background and experiences were an asset. That she had a unique perspective that could help her become an excellent lawyer.

At first, Maya was hesitant, but she decided to take a chance and applied to law school. To her surprise, she got in. Maya received a full scholarship based on her academic achievements and personal background.

In law school, Maya faced many challenges and moments of self-doubt. She persevered and graduated with honors. She went on to become a successful lawyer. She specialized in representing clients who were marginalized and underrepresented.

Looking back, Maya realized that her limiting beliefs were - limiting. She could achieve her dreams. Her background and experiences gave her a unique perspective that was valuable in the legal profession. She learned that sometimes, the biggest obstacle standing in the way of our dreams is ourselves. We need to challenge our limiting beliefs to reach our full potential.

What are limiting beliefs?

Limiting beliefs are thoughts or ideas that we hold about ourselves, others, or the world around us. Limiting beliefs prevent us from acting or achieving our goals. These beliefs are often formed early in life. They can be reinforced by negative experiences, feedback, or social conditioning. They can manifest in various forms. Such as self-doubt, fear, guilt, shame, or perfectionism. Limiting beliefs can impact different areas of our lives. Such as relationships, career, health, or personal growth. A limiting belief is a thought or belief that limits our ability to experience happiness and fulfillment. These beliefs can develop early in life. Often because of negative experiences, feedback, or social conditioning. They can strengthen our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors over time.

Limiting beliefs are self-imposed restrictions that prevent individuals from reaching their full potential. They can result in feelings of anxiety and low self-esteem. Limiting beliefs is one of the biggest hindrances to success and happiness. These beliefs can take many forms. They all have one thing in common: they limit your ability to achieve what you want in life.

One of the main problems with limiting beliefs is that they are often subconscious and automatic. Meaning that we are not aware of them or how they influence our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. They can be difficult to identify and overcome. They are often ingrained in our psyche and may feel like a part of who we are. They can create a self-fulfilling prophecy. This is where we act in ways that confirm our beliefs and limit our possibilities. For example, if we believe that we are not good enough, we may avoid taking risks, seeking feedback, or pursuing opportunities that could challenge or confirm our beliefs. This can lead to a sense of frustration, or resignation, and prevent us from growing, learning, or experiencing new things.

Like Maya, many people believe that their limiting beliefs are based on reality. The truth is that they are just not true. For example, someone who believes they are not smart enough to go to college is basing this belief on past experiences or negative messages they've received from others. Yet, this belief is not based on fact. It is a perception that has taken hold in their mind.

How do we address limiting beliefs?

The first step in overcoming limiting beliefs is to become aware of them. This requires a willingness, to be honest with ourselves. To examine our thoughts and beliefs, and to question their validity. We can start by noticing when we feel stuck, frustrated, or blocked in our lives, and asking ourselves what beliefs might be contributing to these feelings. For example, if we are struggling to find a fulfilling career, examine the beliefs we hold about our skills, abilities, and worthiness. Ask ourselves whether we can find a job we love, whether we are worthy of success, or whether we have something valuable to offer the world.

The good news is that limiting beliefs are not fixed or permanent. They can be challenged, reframed, or replaced with more empowering beliefs. By recognizing and challenging them, you can begin to break free from their hold and start to live the life you want. The key is to act, no matter how small or scary it may seem. The first step is to become aware of our beliefs and how they affect our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. This requires a willingness, to be honest, curious, and compassionate. Also, to acknowledge the possibility that our beliefs may not be true or helpful. It also requires a willingness to take responsibility for our own growth and development and to seek support, guidance, or feedback from others who can help us see things from a different perspective.

Another way to overcome limiting beliefs is to act despite our fears or doubts. This requires courage, resilience, and a willingness to embrace discomfort and uncertainty. By taking small steps toward our goals, we can build momentum, gain confidence, and create new experiences that challenge and expand our beliefs. We can also celebrate our progress, acknowledge our efforts, and learn from our mistakes and setbacks.

Here are a few tips to help you get started:

Identify your limiting beliefs: The first step in overcoming limiting beliefs is to identify what they are. Write down any negative thoughts or self-imposed restrictions that are holding you back. Take a good look at what you have written and ask yourself if these beliefs are true.

Challenge your limiting beliefs: Once you have identified your limiting beliefs, it is time to challenge them. Ask yourself why you believe them and if there is any evidence to support them. If you cannot find any, it is time to start questioning the validity of these beliefs.

Replace negative beliefs with positive ones: Once you have challenged your limiting beliefs, it's time to replace them with positive ones. Write down affirmations that counteract your negative beliefs and repeat them to yourself every day.

Act: The final step in overcoming limiting beliefs is to act. Start small and work your way up to bigger challenges. The more you push yourself, the more your limiting beliefs will begin to dissolve.

Once we have identified our limiting beliefs, we can start to question them and test their validity. We can ask ourselves questions such as:

• Where did this belief come from?

• What evidence do I have to support it?

• What evidence do I have to refute it?

• What would be possible if I did not believe this?

• What would be the worst that could happen if I tried something new or different?

• What would be the best that could happen if I tried something new or different?

• What would I say to a friend who had this belief?

By exploring these questions, we can start to challenge our assumptions, broaden our perspective, and create new possibilities. We can also use positive affirmations, visualization, or other techniques to reinforce more empowering beliefs that align with our values, goals, and strengths. For example, instead of saying "I'm not good enough," we could say "I'm learning and growing every day," or "I have unique talents and skills that I can share with the world."

In Conclusion

In conclusion, limiting beliefs are one of the biggest hindrances to success and happiness. By recognizing and challenging them, you can start to break free from their hold and live the life you want. The key is to act, no matter how small or scary it may seem. So, go out there and start making the changes you need to live the life you deserve!

Remember, limiting beliefs are just that – beliefs. They are not facts, and they do not define who you are. By recognizing and challenging them, you can start to break free from their hold and live the life you want.

To overcome these beliefs, individuals can engage in cognitive-behavioral therapy. Which involves identifying and challenging negative thought patterns. Additionally, practices such as mindfulness and self-care can help individuals build resilience and reduce anxiety.

It is important to remember that everyone experiences limiting beliefs and anxiety at some point in their lives. It is okay to seek help in overcoming them. The road to healing and growth can be a journey, but with support and a positive attitude, individuals can break free from their limiting beliefs and live fulfilling lives.

Overcoming limiting beliefs is a lifelong journey that requires self-awareness, self-compassion, and self-motivation. It requires us to be open to feedback, to learn from others, and to be willing to adapt and grow. It also requires us to be patient, persistent, and resilient in the face of challenges, setbacks, or failures. By embracing a growth mindset, we can turn our limiting beliefs into opportunities.


About the Author

Dr. Dantzler has dedicated the past 20+ years to working with individuals at various stages of personal growth and transition. Dr. Dantzler is a Board Certified Counselor, a Master Addiction Counselor, and a Licensed Professional Counselor in the State of Georgia. She has

worked in a variety of clinical settings, including intensive outpatient, and residential treatment.

26 views0 comments


bottom of page